Life Is Endurance
by SpellStorm
Summary: One-Shot. Sabine has always come across and rude and uncaring. But what is the truth behind her actions?


**This one-shot is in Sabine's POV. Its about her life, and why she's always so rude. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE READ THE BOOKS TO UNDERSTAND THIS. Although I do suggest having some knowledge of the series. At least know what Guardians and Keepers are. Not all the information in this one-shot is true, but only because, although Sabine is a semi-important character, this part of her life is never actually addressed in detail. So please bear with me.**

**PLEASE review! I might put some more one-shots up in other POVs later on.**

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><p>I AM SILENT.<p>

I do not tell the others what goes on with Efron. I am sure they guess. But I do not initiate conversation about it, and neither do they. Cosette is too scared of what could happen to her. Dax is too uncomfortable with the topic. Neville is too thoughtful to actually start a conversation. And Ren is to courteous to bring it up.

I wish they would ask.

But maybe it is better this way.

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><p>I AM ALONE.<p>

I know that others have been in my position before. We are Guardians: it is our duty to serve our masters in every way. But, at this point in time, I am the only one to go through this. No one can relate. And it hurts me.

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><p>I AM CAREFUL.<p>

I do not let all of my feelings show. Instead, I hide behind a mask of hatred and curtness. I allow no one to view the real emotions that swirl within me like an angry tornado: fear, pain, the need to feel comforted and safe.

I will never recieve any of the love or caring that others feel.

And so, I keep my true self hidden.

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><p>I AM ALIVE.<p>

It is something that people have a hard time realizing, I think. I know what the Nightshade alpha, Calla, thinks of me. I know what her packmates, Fey, Mason, Bryn, and Ansel, think of me. They do not think I am hurt by their words and glares. No one does.

Because I am the girl who hurts so much already.

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><p>I AM NOTHING.<p>

That is the problem. Since before I was born, plans have been made for my life. Those plans changed when the Keeper of my pack, Efron Bane, layed eyes on my ten-year-old body. Since then, I have served his needs, whenever he needs me to.

I cannot say no.

I cannot run away.

I am forced to endure the pain and humiliation.

So I retreat into my mind, the only place where I can roam free and be myself.

It is not the best choice.

But it is the only one.

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><p>"Sabine?"<p>

I wearily lift my head from my knees. Bryn, Calla Tor's best friend and beta, is looking at me. She is studying the lash marks that cover my body. I cough, the revolting taste still lingering in my mouth.

"What?" I manage to wheeze out. My lungs are on fire.

"Are you okay?"

I want to snarl and growl at her, but she seems sincere. _She is not the enemy,_ I remind myself.

"I should be fine. It's nothing."

"Nothing? Sabine, that was the third wraith today. You can't take much more of this. No one can."

_The Keepers are the enemy now,_ I tell myself. _You should be a pack right now. Act like it._

I take a deep, burning breath. "I'll take a thousand wraiths every day over what I've had to deal with for seven years."

Bryn looks curious now. "What do you mean?"

"A Guardian's duties don't always end at protection and warriorship. Sometimes we have to do things for our masters - things that make us curse our beauty."

I hope Bryn might take offense to that - although I mean none - and drop the subject, but luck isn't on my side.

"What are you talking about? Did Efron make you do something?"

I just nod.

"What?"

I sigh. "Bryn. I'm female. He is male. It's quite simple, really."

She thinks for a moment. Then realization dawns on her face.

"Oh my God, Sabine. I had no idea..."

"It doesn't matter now, Bryn. You can't change the past, so you shouldn't dwell on it. I don't."

"But how can you ignore it? You were ten!"

"I've learned to live with it. And that's that."

Bryn is silent, but only for a moment. "Sabine?"

I surpress a groan. "Yes?"

"I'm glad we're in the same cell. You know, once you let down your guard, you're really a nice person."

And just those words make me feel better.

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><p><strong>Here are some things that might make this easier to understand:<strong>

**Wraiths- Can be summoned by Keepers. They are basically shadow guards, and are used to torture. They smell revolting.**

**Keepers- 'Magical' beings. They are in charge of the Guardians, but only because they lie to everyone. Very powerful. Do not mess with them.**

**Guardians- 'Magical' beings. They were supposedly created by a grateful Keeper. They have the ability to transform into a wolf. Do not confuse with werewolves Also, do not attempt to pet. They will snap at you.**

**Efron Bane- Keeper. 'Master' of the Bane pack. I will not go into detail of what he does to Sabine. If you still don't understand, PM me and I will tell you.**

**Calla Tor- The main character of the series. She is the alpha of the Nightshade pack, which is run under Lumine Nightshade. Calla is NOT a girly-girl.**

**I think that's good. Please PM me with any questions.**

**Thanks for reading! Please review!**


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